I Ran

I did something I had wanted to do for a very long time but hadn't. I ran. The last time I tried running was about 3-4 months ago in Acıbadem. There, I had taken a very short run, not even passing 3-4 buildings. I was out of breath, felt a bit foolish, and immediately rushed home. That day, I thought running there wouldn't motivate me much. The thought of what people would say was overwhelming. I needed to go further away to run, but how many road hazards would I have to overcome to get to those far places? Going by bicycle was logical, but then I was afraid to lock my bike somewhere with my flimsy lock.

This morning, I woke up at 4 AM again, read a book for a bit, and went out for a run at 6 AM. An important detail for me is that I didn't suddenly decide to run. After waking up in the morning, I decided to do this while making my daily plan. I took a note, and during a pomodoro break, I took my shoes out of the closet and put them in between. I had no excuse not to go. Before doing this, I thought about this: I might not always find the motivation to do this and similar activities continuously, I wasn't starting because I was afraid I'd quit. In fact, there was always a risk of quitting. I understood that. Routines can be broken after a while. But returning to the routine with a new habit could be a great step, I think. My short run didn't even last 15 minutes, I think. I just ran through the streets amidst bird chirps, inhaling the scent of flowers blooming on trees, without thinking about the coronavirus for a bit. When my breathing became difficult due to my lack of fitness and the pressure in my chest increased, I said that's enough for today. This is just a memory of mine.